Three Things Great Parents Do Differently by Dr. Glenna Rice
Most parents want the best for their children, what can you do as a parent that will contribute to creating more ease for you and empower your children to be greater? Dr. Glenna Rice discusses the three things great parents do for their children.
Parents find that most of the time they think their kids require something of them and they actually don’t. If you’re having guilt and shame because you’re putting your kids in front of the TV, well guilt and shame are distracters from what you are. Distracters will keep you from awareness every single time when you feel guilt or shame. You can’t see what’s going on around you.
If you’re asking yourself 'do my children require anything of me right now.' For example, if you think they’re in front of the TV for too long and you get a yes, then change something. If you get a no well maybe the kid just had a full day at school and they’re decompressing in front of the TV, or maybe they’re really enjoying it. I’ve been really liberal with TV with my kids their whole life and they’re amazing children and doing very well.
#1: Ask what your children require of you. There is so much information about who they are, who you are, and what your lives are actually like.
When our children actually require something from us, they let us know. They come up and they find us, they call us. That’s a really good clue that they require something and it feels like five seconds of your time. Hopefully they just want to know that your energy is always available to them.
My youngest makes chocolate chip cookies on her own all of the time. She started baking and I was like do you want help? No, she doesn’t want help, she had YouTube videos that showed her stuff, she wanted to try it out. She makes stuff all the time. If I had been in the mix of it she wouldn’t have actually acquired the skills she has which is actually better than mine in the kitchen now with baking.
By me not giving her too much of me, by me not thinking I have to be involved with her, she actually empowered herself to create what she wanted. I was always there, my energy was there if she had a question but I didn’t get involved because she was creating what she wanted.
#2: Parents never give up their life for their children. Parents should keep a healthy distance so to speak.
The thing is when you’re aware of these things, everything is easier and things get greater, and things get smoother. If I was forcing baking cookies on her because I thought that's what was required of me as a parent, it wouldn’t have been fun for her. She may have stopped it.
The last of the three things is one of the most important and the hardest to embrace as a parent. One of the things that great parents do differently is they’re willing to be seen as a bad parent. Not that you have to be a bad parent, but someone is always going to judge you. Your mother-in-law is going to judge you, other parents at the school are going to judge you, the teachers will judge you. Someone is always going to judge that you’re not parenting the way that they should or the way that they think you should.
Willing to be a bad parent is a willingness to receive their judgments. It has nothing to do with me and how I parent. If you’re creating parenting that works for you, you can’t be worried and concerned about what other parents or what other people are thinking about what you’re doing.
#3: Willing to be a bad parent opens up tons of possibilities on how you can parent.
If you’re trying to be a good parent, you will never see anything that works for you because you’re trying to fit into some box that has nothing to do with the kids you’re raising. Every child is different and every child’s parents parent differently. You can’t see what works for you if you’re trying to avoid people’s judgment or your own judgments about what a good or bad parent is.